Last Call

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Dear Readers: Overheard at Norm's Olde Irish Pub about 1:30 this morning...

Well, ya shee Norm ol' buddy, it's like thish:

A herd of buffalo only moves as fast as the slowest buffalo; and when the herd is hunted, the slowest and weakest animals at the back are always the ones that go down first.

This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the entire group improves steadily with the regular elimination of its weakest members!

In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as its slowest cells.

Excessive intake of alcohol, as we know, kills brain cells.  Similar to your buffalo herd, the slowest and weakest brain cells are attacked and killed first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells making the brain a faster and more efficient machine!

That's the reason why you always feel smarter after a couple 'a three or four beers.  'Nuther...

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Editor's Comments:
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Wow!  Drinking beer makes you smarter?

What a revelation!  What a Godsend!

That kind of education beats the smack out of sitting there in class all day long!  I wonder if there's any way at all to get a scholarship...