Suite Tooth

Dumb Crooks Dept:
.
Local Crime:
.
County.police reported that that the lure of
chocolatelwasltoo .much for a 22-year-old
Oakmont man to resist.
.
Darahl Lugg of 321 Sycamore was charged
with breaking and entering and accused of
stealing 3 boxes .of candy from Food Giant
Supermarket located at 1502 West Ave.
.
Detectives found Lugg and most of the can-
dy three blocks away by following a trail of
KitKat, M&M, and Hershey wrappers, lead-
ing all the way from the store to where...
.
Pending his arraignment, Lugg is currently
being held at the Fulston County...
.
********************
Editor's Comments:
********************
Tried and convicted of the heinous crime, the crook was sentenced to a term of 6 months in the slammer.
.
Now dressed in prison oranges, as Lugg was being led from the court- room by the Bailiff the Judge took the opportunity to sarcastically in- form him that since he was so fond of candy he'd now have the oppor- tunity to see how much he enjoyed the rather large supply of assorted suites on the third floor of the county jail.
.
Not done with his caustic humor, he also told the crook that he'd have made the sentence longer but he didn't want Lugg to get indigestion
.
So now he adds insult to injury. Super! Don't you just love and adore smart-mouthed jurists? .Anyway, justice was apparently served.
.
Thinking about the sentence, as The Editor was leaving the courtroom he wondered if Lugg would put on weight while he was in the pokey.
. .
dit dit dit dit... dit dit dit dit... update!
.
It turns out that with virtually unlimited suites available and his for the taking, Lugg not only gained weight, he gained so much weight that he had to change his name to Logg after he got out of the clink.
.
All of this just goes to show that you should never-ever go grocery shopping when you've got a case of the hungries.